Day 241 Risk: Not Make Any Resolutions

Happy New Year! Woohoo!!

I am pumped about 2012. I feel really, really good entering this year. I have no definitive reason to believe this, but I am truly confident that my year will be filled with positivity and happiness, plus a dash of getting what I want.

Normally I would spend some considerable time this week creating a list of things I wanted to accomplish in the new year. I would have a list of probably thirty to fifty things in all areas of my life that I wanted to improve on or change or make happen (you don’t have to tell me how loco this sounds; I realize that a list that long is overzealous. Go big or go home right?). Every year I start out feeling positive about all of these “resolutions”, but eventually, of course, forget about the list or let things fall to the wayside, or find myself struggling to actually accomplish some of the more difficult goals I’ve set for myself. I usually get to the end of the year and sigh, feeling like I didn’t live up to this imaginary line I’ve created.

This year I want life to be different for me, better, more positive and free. I’ve determined that making this list goes against that, not to mention that if I want things to be different, then I need to be different; feeding in to my Type A side doesn’t really foster my making a change.

I’m a little fearful of not having this path to follow, even if most years I fall off the path and hang out in the brambles for many months. The list gave me a sense of comfort that I had something to come back to, that I knew what I wanted because it was documented somewhere. I’m crazy. I know. You don’t have to remind me. Teaching myself that I don’t need these false security blankets is a tough process. Here’s hoping I’m better for it.

So bring it on 2012. I may not know where I’m going this year, but hopefully I’ll get there a little bit more free than I am right now.

And here’s hoping your 2012 is as kick ass as as mine is going to be!

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